Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh is what I feel today and yesterday and the day before. I dunno why I am a mix of such hyper emotions when I have withstood much more pressure at work. I guess its because at school there are so many inputs being thrown at you and so many people coming at you with their feelings all at the same time.Also I am looking for my identity ......settling in is one thing but I sure do not want to be the same as everyone else.So now I'm trying to discover what am I good at, what can I leverage, what makes me different. I want to be able to focus ..........I want to be able to do so many things.But I'm a bit lazy as well can I not just reap the rewards without the hard work.
This is some decisions I have made 1) Focus of this course is to get a good job with this I mean no compromises- something that satisfies, remunerates and is whatever I want.
2) I feel sometimes that I should be liked by everybody in class and I know that is an unrealistic expectation that will unnecssarily get me into trouble but I sure would like a few friends in class that I can bank on.
More thoughts later..............but atleast I've decided on some things.Thankfully I have a parallel life and I'm going to enjoy that now. THere is an empty house party at a close friends place and we are all girls! Oh the real joys in life!!!!